Lindsay, Lindsay, Lindsay.   Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. 

You just had to go on a Party Spree again, didn't you?  Remember saying that you didn't think you were an Alcoholic?  Word, girl, you are.  You're a drunk, albiet a great looking one.  And you can't drive, especially after one of those sprees.  You deserve that DUI and deserve to do 'Hilton Time', 45 days commuted to 2 weeks. 

In fact, let's put a smiley face on it.  :) 

Let's do one of those notorious Hilton Type Reality Shows!  You know, like when Paris and Nicole worked on a Farm?  Only this time we'll film you and Paris as cellmates! Hence, the Title: Spoiled Bishes: Lock Up!

We will have all sorts of activities planned for you and Paris to get into:

Food Fight (in the prison cafeteria)

Strip Search (really buff guards!)

Bunkmates (curl up with Paris and cry your eyes out! Extra acting credit!)

Contraband (sneak in some coke! Only it turns out that it's Coca Cola, haha!)

Visitation (Nicole makes a guest appearance, tries to get the chihuahua past the guards)

Of course every episode will feature viginettes of you and Paris discussing Prison Life and how much you've learned your lessons.   We will also up play how many 'extras' you girls get due to your star status.  Maybe we can get Britney to do a guest spot.

We have an opportunity to take this to the next level, Lindsay.  Let's do this thing.

Zenny, PR of the Stars